Social media is fast taking the place of relationships these days, there are many instances where love is meant to be shown but social media take the first place. Take a quick peep at the following scenarios.
Scenario 1
A lady sees her friend and refused
to say hello and the friend starts to wonder, what could be the problem? The
last time I checked we were not having any quarrel neither do we have any
misunderstanding that I know of. Out of curiosity she asks her friend what the
problem was and the following conversation ensued between them.
Titi: What’s up with you girl? You
are kinda cold today, what is the matter?
Sandra: Are you asking me? You mean
you don’t know what you did?
Titi: (Surprised) Me? What did I do?
Sandra: You of all people, you
didn’t come to see me neither did you send a text or call me two days ago on my
birthday.
Titi: Ah… I actually wrote on your
timeline on facebook on that day ooo
Scenario 2
Congratulations to Mr & Mrs
Femi Badmus who just married last weekend. But Femi isn’t happy with Jide his
childhood friend. What happened? Listen to a telephone conversation they had…
Jide: Femo lala, how far now…latest
oko iyawo (groom) in town, hope you are taking care of that young lady.
Femi: (in Pidgin English) he no suppose be you, you fall my hand wella.
Jide: Wetin I do this time oo?
Femi: You no show face for my
wedding, you didn’t even call to ask how preparations were going on before the
wedding or call to congratulate me after the whole ceremony.
Jide: Bros no vex, I got so busy
with stuffs but I liked your pictures on Instagram and facebook naa?
Scenario 3
A young couple went to see a
marriage counsellor because of some misunderstandings they have been having.
What is the cause of their misunderstanding?
Counsellor: Good morning Mr &
Mrs James. You are here today, hope all is well?
Husband: All is well, my wife will
not let me rest and she keeps picking on little issues and she makes me wonder
if she still loves me despite all I do for her.
Wife: Ma, all is not well ooo, my
husband will hardly express his love to me by telling me he loves me, he doesn't communicate love to me. He keeps
posting write ups that are very nice on his facebook page about me on my
birthday and on our wedding anniversaries and saying how much he loves me and
how much I mean to him but he hardly tells me half of those things when we are
together in the house.
Counsellor: Is that true Mr James?
Husband: Hmmm…mmm - maybe true. I
love her and that is why we are still married. Do I need to say it all the
time?
Counsellor: Of course! You are
married to your wife and not to people’s opinion or perception. You keep
writing things on social media and people love what you write including me and
admiring your relationship from afar but the wife you are writing about is not
happy because you don’t express the love to her as much as the impression you
create in people’s mind. It is obvious and evident that your wife’s primary love
language is WORDS OF AFFIRMATION.
Here is the crux of the matter, as
much as social media is good, it shouldn’t replace the social and family ties
we have with family, friends and loved ones. Let’s reach out to friends and
loved ones when it matters on special occasions via visits, calls and even
present gifts in addition to whatever we post on social media platforms. The practice of gift giving is fast fizzling
out in our culture. Gone are the days when people celebrated birthdays and
weddings and would have truck-load of gifts afterward. Let’s bring back and
imbibe the habits of giving gifts again.
Let’s learn to always speak the
love language of our partners and let us stop assuming. If you can just be
observant enough after knowing the five primary love languages as enumerated by
Gary Chapman, you would be able to
decipher the love language of your partner and even friends and this would help you in relating with them appropriately. For more on love languages, clickhere.
Building strong family systems is
one of the strong issues Worldlight Foundation International is out to address.
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